Thursday, June 28, 2007

Snakes, why did it have to be snakes?

Last night I was staying in a caravan in a caravan park. Torrential rain started, and the water started rising around my caravan. Luckily, my neighbour in the next caravan knew what to do to deal with the flood.

First, you have to take an empty peanut butter jar, and then put a teaspoon of coffee into the base. Then you have to catch one of the snakes from underneath the flooded caravan and put it into the jar. Then put the yellow lid on tightly. If the lid isn't on tightly enough, or the lid isn't yellow it won't work. Then look closely at the snake. Check that it has small, round black eyes, and that the scales under the jawline (are they called jaws in snakes?) are the very white, almost translucent ones. Check that they poke their tongue out often and it is forked. Then throw the jar into the water.

If you fill enough of the jars with snakes and coffee, the floods will recede and everything will return to normal.

No wonder I've been so drained today. It wasn't a very restful night.

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Um, okay

To the person who found my blog looking for decapitated possum. Why? Why on earth would you search google for that?

That is just plain odd.

I should have turned left at Alberqueque

I've spent tonight at a trivia night run by one of my girlfriends as a fundraiser for her son's school. I went solo as the boy was having a geeky boy bonding night. He isn't a big trivia night fan either, and I'm not a massive fan of watching him sitting around bored getting cranky. The school is about a 20 minute drive from my house, but it was a little like going to another country. Set way back in a green pocket of suburbia, the roads go up and down like petrol prices, and everything is quite bucolic.

When the night was finally over, we all headed back to our cars to head home. I cleared the frost off my windows, and waited for the heat to kick in before I drove off. I decided that rather than leave the way I came, I would take the shortcut back to the main road. Some shortcut. It took me 2o minutes to get back to where I came from.

I found myself driving up hill and down dale, on roads without streetlights, with soft edges and speedhumps. The roads were dark and overhung with trees, and I had no idea what was around each corner. At the same time, the mist was getting heavier, and there were places I couldn't see more than 10 metres in front of me. Pretty scary.

I drove down a hill, with yellow signs all the way along the edges telling me that the road was narrowing. At the bottom of the hill was a give way sign, but no driveways or intersecting roads. I couldn't work out what was going on, so I turned on my high beams. It was the skinniest bridge I've ever seen. I told the car to breathe in (don't laugh - it was dark, and 12.15 and I'm a bit tired) and started driving across it. About halfway across I had the most overwhelming sensation of déja vu. I know I've crossed that bridge sometime in my life, but I've got no idea when or why. It is going to bug me for days.

I wonder what I will dream about tonight....

Oh, and in case you were wondering - our table came second, and I won a bottle of red wine in the lucky envelope and a dvd player in the raffle. Goodness knows what I'll do with it.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

I have learnt ...

not to describe people who drive me nuts at work as incompetent boobs.

It freaks out the young ones and gives rise to many bra jokes.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Morning drive

A foggy morning. I can't see the end of my driveway. I only know when I'm near the end of the street because of the blue markers on the road.

Driving down the winding road next to the river. No street lights. The gum trees loom through the mist. It is eerie with the fingers of the fog touching the road in patches.

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Girly day

I had a very girly day on Saturday.

I decided a few weeks ago that I wanted to host a manchester party. I know I've posted about how much I love my sheets before, and the site that I purchased them from offers the option to host your own party. For me, the highlight was that there were no sales people, they just send out samples and you can do what you want, while drinking the champagne and eating the snacks that they sent with them. If anyone wants to buy anything, they can just jump online and buy it.

I was very excited when the courier dropped off the big box on Thursday night. I was so restrained though, and didn't open it. (okay, until Friday morning!) The box had a beautifully wrapped pass the parcel, and it was stuffed full of goodies. All the product samples were wrapped up in brown paper, tied with ribbon and smelt of lavender.

The girls and my mum started arriving about 3. My phone was running hot for a while as I got texts from people running late, and one of my friends always forgets what number I live at. You would think she knew better by now, but really. I wasn't fussed about whether people arrived on time though, because we got to coo over my friend's 4 week old baby boy. Then my favourite 10 month old girl arrived with her mum too. My brother decided that he didn't want to be around the house with gaggles of giggling, gossiping women, so he very wisely fled. The loungeroom was full of women having a ball, and I loved it. Pass the parcel went off with a bang - there were some very excited people, and that was before they scored slippers, a bib (right when he was being fed too!), egyptian cotton pillowcases, hand towels, tea towels, shoe boxes, and the piece de resistance (won by me!!), the egyptian cotton bathrobe. So warm and soft. It was just a really lovely afternoon, and I found myself resolving to catch up like that more often.

Saturday night my sister finally made it over about 9. We ordered pizza (mmmm, healthy) and watched the first three episodes from season 1 of the Gilmore Girls. She made me promise that I wouldn't watch any more of it without her. Gilmore Girls is another one of my guilty pleasures. I was a late convert - season 6 or so, and I love popping into Stars Hollow for some escapism. It is amazing how much we can talk about while we watch it.

I'm very proud of my mum in her first foray into online shopping. She was very excited about it. Added bonus for the day is that my 4 year old sister convinced dad to bring her over at lunchtime, and we got to watch an episode of Angelina Ballerina. More pink girliness. I think she just comes to see me because she knows I keep a dvd here just for her.

Saturday in a nutshell - spending time with people I love, just enjoying each other.

Eight Randoms

Eight Randoms

I was tagged by Evalinn, here are 8 random facts about me:

1. I hate wearing nail polish on my fingers, but feel naked without bright red toenail polish.
2. I really need to stop dreaming about Rupert Murdoch.
3. I like to tear the crusts of fresh white bread, eat the crusts and then squish the centre into a ball before eating it.
4. I always talk to the radio when I'm driving.
5. I can't help singing alone with Achy Breaky Heart and I'll never remove it from my iPod.
6. I really don't like following rules.
7. White wine makes me feel queasy at 3pm the day after I drink it. Red wine doesn't.
8. I love hats, but feel stupid when I wear them.

Now, I tag:
If you want to do it, go for it. Just leave a comment and let me know you've done it.

The rules are:
1. I have to post these rules before I give you the facts.
2. Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
3. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
4. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
5. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

Monday, June 18, 2007

Now we are one

Today is my blog's first birthday. I can't believe it has been a year already.

I've been visited 1,351 times. Some people have found me using very odd keywords:
  • dreams and stringbeans
  • you are an institution where you are going
  • chinese custom giving watermelon
  • time to face the strange
  • palmolive pure cashmere ad cast
  • joan osborne breakfast in bed blogspot
  • rhys muldoon addiction
  • bottling stringbeans
  • water saver tap
I hope that they found what they were looking for. I'm not sure if that was me or not :)

Monday, June 11, 2007

I hear the secrets that you keep...

We had a lovely weekend away - photos to follow soon when I get my act together enough to download them. Again, it was one of those weekends with the odd dreaming and the bizarre talking in my sleep made the first conscious conversations each morning pretty peculiar.

Just after midnight Saturday night, I felt the need to tell the boy what I thought was wrong with Lindsay Lohan, and how he needed to stop being a bad influence on her. Apparently I wasn't very helpful explaining who she was or what was wrong with her. He still doesn't understand what I was talking about. Not sure that I do either.

Sunday morning we were doing that doze, read, doze thing that makes Sunday morning so lovely when you don't have to get up if you don't want to. I admit that I was doing more sleeping than reading. I got quite agitated at one point, and told him that we had to go to church. He tried to calm me down, and told me that church was over for the day. That's when I told him God was mad with him. Every church we drove past after that, he offered to stop for me. Helpful.

Sunday night in my dream I got stuck in my gmail inbox. It didn't matter what I did but whenever I spoke to someone they got a star next to them, and it was like the simpsons episode when homer disappears into the third dimension. I could move my arms and the inbox moved with them. Freaky. At least I wasn't the only one having odd dreams - he dreamt that I was yelling at him because he hadn't cleaned up his bedroom. The funniest part is that I've never met anyone with a tidier bedroom than him (and we won't talk about my messy bedroom!)

Monday morning he was trying to convince me that waking up for breakfast in bed was a good idea. Nah, wasn't interested. I did ask him to promise that we wouldn't call our children Sapphire and Kevin though. He thinks I'm nuts.

Saturday, June 09, 2007

Hitting the road ...

Monday is our last public holiday until November. I'm not sure if it is particularly cruel to make us all work through the grey of winter without a day off to look forward to, or particularly good planning to stop excessive sickies when the weather is nice and no one wants to be at work. I wonder if that applies in other countries too - are there more public holidays in winter or summer?

Anyway, the boy and I are off for the weekend. The forecast for the weekend is for cold, foggy mornings, and crisp clear days. I'm looking forward to enjoying red wine next to the open fire, the roast I've got planned for Sunday night, dinner out tonight (and the nice people where we are staying are driving us there and back!), and wandering around new towns and places. I've remembered to pack my camera, so hopefully some photos when I get back.

Saturday, June 02, 2007

These dreams go on ....

Last night I dreamt that I slept in and when I went outside to get the paper I discovered that my brother had dug up the front lawn and put in a swampy marshy area which was full of reeds and lilies. It was absolutely stunning, and the lilies were all in bloom, with just about every colour, various shades of pink, white, a rich deep red, yellows and a very pale purple, so pale it was almost blue. It reminded me a little of a photo I took in Ballina when we were on holidays last year.

He said that he had changed the garden so that we had a better supply of water so that I could have the roses I wanted, as well as the camellias. I can understand the roses, because I have been coveting the blood red roses, so dark they are nearly black, with their rich scent. Camellia's have never registered on my radar though.

I woke up after this and had a bit of a prowl around the house. When I went back to bed I managed to get back to sleep, and found myself back in the dream. Unfortunately, my next door neighbour burst my bubble, although why he looked like Rupert Murdoch I've got no idea. He peered over the fence the way Wilson used to in Home Improvement and told me that it was an illegal water feature, and we would need to get it fenced off or fill it in because we were breaking the law. Then he told me that it was attracting mosquitoes and would continue to do so unless we could guarantee that the water would be constantly moving. Damn reality intruding on my dreams.

I've got no idea how the hell I came up with that one, but it is definitely bizarre. I've just worked out where the lilies and camellia's came from. I've been rereading Kerry Greenwood's Phryne Fisher series (I do like a romp through Melbourne in the 1920's) and there is a character called Camellia who designs Phryne's garden for her and includes lilies in one. There was a whole section about a Chinese custom of putting tea leaves into a lotus flower overnight creates an exotic tea. That is a relief.

Friday, June 01, 2007

On the first day of winter

I woke up and sprang (sprung?) out of bed before the alarm went off at 6.15 this morning. Much to the disgust of the cat who had just hopped onto the bed and hoped for a cuddle and me to stay in bed and keep him warm while he slept. Foiled again.

Played nicely and let my brother have first shower and pottered around - read some blogs, had a giggle at the person who found my blog by searching Google for "bottling stringbeans", filled the kettle to make coffee, fed the cat. Discovered why the cat was so uninterested in his breakfast. Nothing like a partially decapitated possum under the dining table to start the day right. I'm stunned he managed to do it in the half hour between being let out and me getting up though. Little bugger. More bells for him. 6 this time I think. I've just worked out who the possum reminded me of, Nearly Headless Nick from the Harry Potter books. Yep, I'm rereading again.

Managed to shower and head off to work. Mmmmm, foggy. A very crisp morning though, which turned into a really lovely day. Of course, now that the weekend is here, we've got a forecast for much needed rain. I look at my Google homepage, and see on my weather radar that the rain is on it's way now. Woohoo!!

Pick up my two pieces of Vegemite toast and coffee to start the morning right at work. Time for the morning desk calendar duel with my lovely colleague. Today "The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain" Thank you Ms Parton, so very true. I really love our quote duels, and miss them when they don't happen though. While I had those few days off earlier this week with my germ infestation, she was sending me gorgeous emails like "

We are all stars and we all deserve to twinkle – MARILYN MONROE
Hope you are feeling better – get lots of rest and keep warm.
Can’t wait to see you when you have got your twinkle back!

That is one of the reasons I love my job and the people I work with.

Another crazy frantic day at work - nothing like a Friday to start the month with. Total lunacy. I stayed back a bit to clean up my desk and make sure I had everything packed up ready for my trip to Sydney next week. I might live dangerously and do the equivalent of cutting off my arm and leaving my laptop at home. Last time it was the beginning of this. I don't ever want to go back to that happy place.

Had the drive home from hell - what normally takes half an hour in peak hour tonight took 1 hour and 40 minutes off peak. Damn you Collingwood for playing at the MCG on a Friday night. I hope you lose. I hope that anyway, but today I really mean it with a vengeance.

Got home and burst into tears at my brother when he wanted to rearrange the furniture to turn on the heater and dry his clothes. All I wanted to do was crash on the couch and watch trashy television for 10 minutes. I know my brain is having moments again now though - I've just reread this paragraph and discovered that I wrote weekend instead of heater. Excellent, brain, connect the right bits please.

What does the weekend hold? A bit of running around, picking up a doctors certificate and getting my car's wiper reservoirs checked. Laundry. Packing and a flight to Sydney. Quite possibly some quality time at the stupidmarket picking up basics for next week. Dinner and quality play time with the boy.

Right now, it is nearly bedtime. It is 9 degrees here, or 48 if you talk Fahrenheit. Bit chilly. Bring on the hot water bottle and the cat I think.

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!