Sentences I never want to hear again ...

When I'm watching the swimming:

"He's swimming through the water"
No, really? In a swimming competition! I guess mud would have been too hard.

"He's coming second at the bottom of the pool"
Drowning the competitors - I don't think that is very kind.

"The pole is speeding through the water"
Um, yeah. Try learning the name of the competitor - especially when he wins.

"How does it feel to have won?"
Well, I'm really not happy about it. What do you think you dill?

"He's the 20th man to break 15 minutes here tonight"
Not a bad effort when there are only 8 competitors.