Soup

I got a text from one of my friends yesterday asking me to make some soup. Just simple vegetable soup for her sick boyfriend until they can work out what is wrong with his stomach.

I loved being able to help her out, and especially enjoyed being able to do something concrete. The simple physical actions of peeling and chopping the potatoes and carrots, picking and slicing the beans and then putting it in the pot with some vegetable stock, pasta and water was very satisfying. Stirring the soup gave my afternoon a soothing routine and smelling the soup throughout the house just made me happy.

There is something I've always loved about the community of cooking and eating together. Now I've learnt about the community of preparing food for others, and not needing to be there to eat with them. I didn't need to be there to watch him eat it, I'm happy that he managed to keep it down and it didn't add to his pain.

Monday Reflections

Monday night, and the weekend is long gone.

My mum celebrated the last birthday of her sixth decade. We had a family lunch at the same beachside restaurant that I had my first farewell lunch at last year. We were disappointed that the entertainment wasn't repeated. It was lovely to sit in the sun with the sea breezes, watching the yachts on the bay. After lunch we went back to mum's house to play with her new toy. She was very excited when my stepfather presented her with a game of quoits. Mum decided that we all needed to play by the rules that were included with the game. So we stepped out 9 feet and used a hockey stick to mark a throwing point. We sucked. We all threw about 60 times each, and only one of my brothers, my sister in law and my stepfather managed to get the quoit over the pole. Heck, we sucked big time. We even tried with our eyes closed. I laughed so hard when I was throwing with my eyes closed I didn't get anywhere near the pole. I guess I was the comic relief.

Yesterday I had an invitation to a 4th birthday party. I had to go and get the rest of his present first, so I accidentally bought 4 books* - the glorious Waterhole by Graeme Base for the birthday boy and the rest for me. I'm thoroughly enjoying Fridge Magnets are Bastards right now. I had the privilege of watching my favourite almost four year olds tear the wrapping paper from his stilts and his book, and then practice walking on the stilts. I do enjoy being his honorary aunt.

One of my favourite things about his birthday parties is that I get to catch up with such a varied group of friends. We celebrate and mourn together. Some of these people have been my friends since the 1980's. This weekend we were celebrating an unexpected but very welcome pregnancy. We were also the ears for the end of a 12 year relationship. Politics and religion got a good going over too.

These are the people that ground me. They are the important people in my life. Without them my life would not be as rich. I'm very lucky to have them in my life.

*They just fell into my arms. Really. It was an accident.

Addiction

I think I'm addicted to Facebook. I've been using it for about a month now and I'm having a bit too much fun with it. It has been just a bit much fun adding friends, sending items for gardens, buying my friends fish and drinks, and having way too much fun gossiping about people changing their relationship status.

Who are my friends on Facebook? My boy. My sister. Everyone in my team at work. My boss in Sydney. My friends from my old job. My sisters friends. People from school I haven't seen since my 21st birthday. My work clients. Friends I've lost touch with and haven't seen since they left the country in 1999. The HR consultant who employed me in my current job. Every single person on my list, I've met at least once.

MySpace is sooooo 2006. I keep getting random friend requests from people I've never heard of, and the amount of spam I get on MySpace is absurd. I'm just not interested. If it wasn't the only way I've got to keep in touch with some of my younger cousins, I wouldn't be there at all anymore. I prefer the layout of Facebook, so much cleaner. Nothing on Facebook has made me want to throw the screen out the window from the vile clashing of colours and flashing images.

I'm enjoying reconnecting with people I don't see enough. It has been really fun hearing about people I haven't seen for a very long time, and finding out just what they've been doing with their lives. Some of the choices have really surprised me, and some have done exactly what I thought they would. For me, the best bit is seeing people happy with the choices they have made. That or they are really good actors.

Girly day

I had a very girly day on Saturday.

I decided a few weeks ago that I wanted to host a manchester party. I know I've posted about how much I love my sheets before, and the site that I purchased them from offers the option to host your own party. For me, the highlight was that there were no sales people, they just send out samples and you can do what you want, while drinking the champagne and eating the snacks that they sent with them. If anyone wants to buy anything, they can just jump online and buy it.

I was very excited when the courier dropped off the big box on Thursday night. I was so restrained though, and didn't open it. (okay, until Friday morning!) The box had a beautifully wrapped pass the parcel, and it was stuffed full of goodies. All the product samples were wrapped up in brown paper, tied with ribbon and smelt of lavender.

The girls and my mum started arriving about 3. My phone was running hot for a while as I got texts from people running late, and one of my friends always forgets what number I live at. You would think she knew better by now, but really. I wasn't fussed about whether people arrived on time though, because we got to coo over my friend's 4 week old baby boy. Then my favourite 10 month old girl arrived with her mum too. My brother decided that he didn't want to be around the house with gaggles of giggling, gossiping women, so he very wisely fled. The loungeroom was full of women having a ball, and I loved it. Pass the parcel went off with a bang - there were some very excited people, and that was before they scored slippers, a bib (right when he was being fed too!), egyptian cotton pillowcases, hand towels, tea towels, shoe boxes, and the piece de resistance (won by me!!), the egyptian cotton bathrobe. So warm and soft. It was just a really lovely afternoon, and I found myself resolving to catch up like that more often.

Saturday night my sister finally made it over about 9. We ordered pizza (mmmm, healthy) and watched the first three episodes from season 1 of the Gilmore Girls. She made me promise that I wouldn't watch any more of it without her. Gilmore Girls is another one of my guilty pleasures. I was a late convert - season 6 or so, and I love popping into Stars Hollow for some escapism. It is amazing how much we can talk about while we watch it.

I'm very proud of my mum in her first foray into online shopping. She was very excited about it. Added bonus for the day is that my 4 year old sister convinced dad to bring her over at lunchtime, and we got to watch an episode of Angelina Ballerina. More pink girliness. I think she just comes to see me because she knows I keep a dvd here just for her.

Saturday in a nutshell - spending time with people I love, just enjoying each other.

:(

I've been worrying about one of my best friends for the last couple of weeks. He lives in New Zealand and he has just moved house, and hasn't given me his new home number yet. He hasn't been answering my texts, and he has been very quiet on the email front.

Today I found out why. He has had a recurrence of bowel cancer. He has just had another tumour removed, and although they are optimistic that they got it all because it was encapsulated, he has been back having radiotherapy and "flashing his arse all over New Zealand". He doesn't know yet if he will have to go and have more chemo. This will be his third round of it in 4 years.

I feel so powerless and useless. I know that his coping mechanism is to shut himself away and deal with things by himself, but I want to be able to do something. He is always there for me, but he doesn't want anyone there for him at the moment. Right now, the only thing I can do is let him deal with things his own way, and be there when he is ready for people again. That and rely on other friends over there to keep an eye on him.

I guess I'm just scared that he is worried that things will go badly, and he is trying to isolate himself more to spare everyone.