Why do you build me up buttercup baby just to let me down

I found myself singing that song a lot yesterday afternoon after I got off the phone from the nice computer technician. My hopes were built up so high, and I really believed that I would have my laptop back yesterday afternoon.

And then, all my hopes came crashing down around me, with the phone conversation I didn't want to have. My beautiful, still new laptop is still a very unhappy camper. Right now, it still won't even acknowledge that it has ever had the Windows O/S installed, even though it still shows that lovely Windows logo, and has Windows error messages and my favourite, the Windows blue screen of death appearing. Woo!! Back to square one. Tomorrow I get to call the geniuses at Hewlett Packard again and go through the joys of their "help desk".

Most disturbing of all, is that I've learnt over the last 2 weeks just how much the internet really is a massive part of my life. The structure of my days has really changed, and I'm feeling quite discombobulated. Each weekday, I would sit down with a cup of coffee or tea, and my breakfast, and catch up with everyone's blogs, maybe post something myself, and read the days headlines. I realised yesterday that I've missed breakfast every day this week, and just how out of whack my routine is. At work, I'm managing to keep up with my emails (thanks Jelly, you've been making me smile) and do any urgent online banking, but I'm just not getting anything else done. I'm trying to plan for the 2 of us to have Easter away, and I haven't had my research and booking tool of choice available to use. I've got posts teeming around in my head, and this is actually a test email to post, so that if I do have stuff I want to say it won't keep whirling around and around in my head. If this works I can draft stuff on my phone :) Someone say geek?

I have to admit though, that I realised just how much I was suffering from withdrawal when we were lying on the bed having a cuddle last night before we went out for dinner and going through our day. I heard myself asking about his time surfing yesterday, and then said "and did you visit any good web sites? What did you do on the internet today? Does the internet miss me?" Quite tragic. I can't imagine why he kept laughing at me - no really. I also really miss the time that we talk using msn when we are both online. I know that we talk on the phone and see each other but it is just that extra bit of communication that keeps things running just a little more smoothly.

Missing in action

My posts will be few and far between for a little while. My still very new laptop has cracked it, and the hard drive has died. This means I have no computer right now. I'm not going to be blogging on the work one. I'm waiting for the nice people to rescue my data for me, and then I'll need to reinstall everything. Aaaaaargh.

I've still got some posts that I wrote last week, and I'm pretty happy with one of them, so when I retrieve them, they will be posted.

Is it bad that I invited myself to mum's for dinner so that I could use their computer and internet? Actually, don't answer that, I think I know...

Word of advice - don't buy anything from Hewlett Packard, especially if you need to ring their help desk. It is very badly named.

An open letter to the taxi drivers of Sydney

Dear taxi drivers,

I don't want to tell you my income or my bank balance. Am I rich? Yes, in many ways I am, but guess what? It is none of your business. My real estate status isn't something I want to share with you either. You don't need to know where or with whom I live, and nor do you need to know who I pay money to each month, whether it is the bank or a landlord.

It is none of your business if I am a good cook and keep a clean house. I have no intention of doing either of those things for you.

When I ask you if you take Cabcharge and you say yes, don't turn around at my hotel and tell me that you won't accept my voucher and demand another credit card. When I give you cash and ask for a receipt, I expect you to write the amount on the receipt, not just the date and your taxi number.

It is none of your business whether or not I am hot in the clothes I am wearing. If I had my damned luggage I would probably change, but you don't need to know that.

I do not want to go to Star City Casino with you. Nor do I want to go out for dinner and dancing with you. No, you can't pick me up when I'm ready to go home, and nor can you take me to the office each morning.

Yeah, I think my cleavage is OK. This does not give you the right to tell me I have great tits.

In fact, please don't speak to me at all. That way we will both be happy.

thisisme

Thisisme's terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

Today I flew up to Sydney. I got to sit in the gate lounge at the airport until after I should have landed because the flights were late. I can live with a late flight.

Then I stood at the baggage carousel and watched a bag that looked just like mine go around and around in circles. Shame the ID number on the tag didn't match mine. To the person who had a bag that looked just like mine, I hope you enjoyed taking my luggage home with you. I didn't enjoy getting to my hotel room with no clean clothes, no toothbrush and no book to read after I finished "Ines of my soul" by Isabel Allende. Much less magic, much more realism, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

And, then, the taxi driver. He gets a special post all to himself.

So I thought I would jump online with my trusty laptop, and at least keep myself amused with some surfing, some blogging and The Vicar of Dibley Christmas special. My laptop didn't turn on.

Right about now, I was ready to burst into tears. I wasn't dressed for work, didn't have work shoes, didn't have the work I packed in my suitcase, I didn't have clean undies or a toothbrush. I was frustrated with the laptop, now downgraded from trusty to tempermental - pretty quick change after 2 and a bit months.

The joy of my boy who was seriously considering getting on a plane to bring me some clothes, the outstanding service and support from the Qantas and Mercure staff were all bright spots in my day.

Discovering just how reliant on my computer I am - disturbing. Is it time for a 12 step program?

Home again ...

and I'm so happy to be here. Tonight I get to sleep in my own bed, and tomorrow I get to drink proper Melbourne coffee again. Most importantly, my laptop and the internet and talking again, and over the next few days I'll publish all the posts I wrote while I was away.

Flying home from Sydney today I saw something I've never seen before. We've got bushfires everywhere in Victoria again, and from the plane, I could see multiple towers of smoke. At the base of each smoke tower, the smoke was tinted a dark red, then orange, and then faded to pink and then grey. As the plane approached Melbourne and landing, we could actually see the masses of red flames. I've never been close to a fire before, and that is as close as I ever want to get. Watches the red tongues flick in and out was strangely compelling, and quite eerie.

The country that wasn't on fire was still so dry - it would be so easy for the whole state to go up in flames. I really hope that those fighting the fires can remain safe, and that includes all of the guest fire fighters from New Zealand, Canada and the US.

Dear Internet

I miss you. Please come back. Not coping. Need internet NOW!!

I'm writing essays on my laptop, but I just haven't been able to make my laptop and the internet talk to each other. Sitting on communal computer. Can't write properly.

Not coping. Please send internet now.

Blogging

Happy New Year everyone!!

I've written some fantastic posts for my blog lately, but they have all been in my head when I've been driving or sitting on a train. Whenever I sit down to write them, I've lost them. Am I losing my mind? I don't think so, and if I was, I don't think that would be the best indicator anyway. Surely a better indicator would be making sure that when I drive to work I park on the same number floor of the multistorey carpark as the floor that I work on, so I only need to remember one number for the lift. Tragic but true.

Anyway, I've been frustrated with not posting, and velvet has saved me with the meme on her site (go visit, the trip is worth it!). So without further ado, here is the three things meme.

1. Three things that scare me
Losing someone I love
Someone finding out that I bluff my way through most of the day and don't really know everything
Waking up to find a stranger in my bedroom

2. Three people who make me laugh (so hard, I can think of many)
Emily's mum - anyone who can make me fall off the chair in tears from laughing deserves a mention
Ehater
My sister

3. Three things I love
Falling asleep listening to waves crashing into the beach
Thunderstorms
Books

4. Three things I hate
Being judged
Intolerance
Rude customer service

5. Three things I don't understand
The appeal of Paris Hilton
Why there is so much suffering in the world
Late night/early morning dating ads

6. Three things on my desk (right now nothing because I cleared it before moving it, so my coffee table is where I'm working)
Scissors
Books
Half a box of chocolates I was given for my birthday

7. Three things I'm doing right now
Watching Hollywood's best kept secret
Listening to my cat eat some more of his dinner
Wishing that it would stop being so damn hot and just rain

8. Three things I want to do before I die
Take a year to drive around Australia
Have children
Skydive

9. Three things I can do
Curl my tongue
Hug
Remember completely useless information

10. Three things I can't do
Take my own advice
Walk past a bookshop
Undercater

11. Three things you should listen to
Your mother
Your body - sometimes it is telling you something you need to listen to
Your gut instinct

12. Three things you should never listen to
Vacuum cleaner salespeople
Telemarketers
How to vote cards

13. Three things I'd like to learn
Bagpipes
Massage
Rowing

14. Three favorite foods
Pfeffernusse (yes, the influence of Christmas is still strong)
Stinky blue cheese
Pink lady apples

15. Three beverages I drink regularly
Water
Coffee
Champagne

16. Three shows I watched as a kid
All creatures great and small
M*A*S*H
The Muppets

Fingers crossed I can actually remember what I want to write soon - maybe next week in my hotel room I'll manage it.